The Untold Story

This is a tale my friends that nobody in the world knows, except one person and that is my girlfriend. I’ve told not a single soul (mostly out of embarrassment and humiliation) but I am willing to reveal all, because eh what have I got to lose? A tale so dark and scary that not even I like it, mostly because it involves me and it’s true. Let me take you back to over two years ago….

                It was May of 2014; I lived in a studio apartment alone in Dryden NY, above a café. Well that’s not true, my cat Dexter lived with me, but just us. I worked at a crappy cleaning job I hated; largely because of the people I worked there with. I spent most of my days alone and I worked nights at that dreadful place with very few I got along with. It was a Saturday early morning and I worked until about 3 A.M. When I got out of work I walked to my car in the empty parking lot. It was dark and foggy out; I could barely make out my car. I started to feel eyes on me. I crept slowly to my car still all the same. Walking at a faster pace now, I swear I heard footsteps behind me. I kept going faster and faster, (geez how big is this parking lot? BIG) I finally made it my car, I fumbled for  my keys in my pocket, I couldn’t get them out, I was shaking with nervousness. I finally pulled them out, but the footsteps were right upon me. It was so foggy I could barely see anything; I finally found the right key and stuck it in the key hole to turn it before behind me a menacing figure stood shrouded by the darkness, I could make out nothing but its huge size. He raised his hand up at me, the huge shadowy figure; I put my hands up in terror and awaited my certain death. But then it said “Hey man you forgot your lunchbox”, and I opened my eyes to see my coworker standing there handing me my lunchbox. I wiped the sweat from my brow “Man, I thought you were a killer or something” I said with relief. He chuckled but suddenly his head was sliced clean off from his body. His blood splattering everywhere I screamed in terror.…OK, OK, OK.. None of that really happened, but would have been cool right? It was all true up until 3 A.M. Let me restart.

               

                 It in fact was 3 A.M., on a Saturday morning and I had just gotten out of my crappy job. I went home for all of about 2 hours. But that morning my brother and a cousin of mine wanted to go fishing. So I basically just took a shower and dozed for like 30 minutes. The drive ahead of me was a good 45 minutes at least. So I said goodbye to my cat Dexter and was on my way. Of course it was all for nothing because we had boat issues and couldn’t go out any way, at least I’m pretty sure this was that day. (It’s really not all that relevant) but I remember my cousin and me hanging out that day still. Later on in the day my cousin and my immediate family and I went to some pizza Italian place for I want to say a surprise anniversary party for my grandparents if I remember correctly. Keep in mind at this point I’m about at 26 hours with no sleep. My head was not on straight that day (yes I’m using my lack of sleep as an excuse for my actions on this day). So we eat some good food, and everybody goes home except I go back to my parent’s house to get my car. I had spoken with the cousin I had been hanging out with about going to see the new movie “Godzilla” that had just hit theaters at the time. I also asked my other cousins who were at the dinner party if they wanted to go. So long story short, we all go to the theater together. I remember having to pee so badly through half the movie it kind of ruined it for me.

   At this time in my life, I’d mostly describe myself as pretty pathetic honestly. Well I mean it wasn’t my entire fault, I worked nights and no friends lived around me. So going out to meet girls wasn’t really something that was just easy to do. I was on an app to meet people near me (nothing gross, it was kind of like Facebook really). When I say “on” I mean I had a profile and stuff, this one girl had messaged me a few days ago. She was kind of bland, and I mean personality wise, she wasn’t that talkative. But nothing about her screamed “GO AWAY!” either, so during the movie, this girl messages me and she’s like “Do You want to meet up later?”, out of the blue really. I tell my cousin about it, and he’s like yeah go for it. I don’t remember what he actually said, but to this day I will always regret not taking this next advice from him. He tells me to give him the address, so at least one person will know where I’m at. Literally the smartest thing he’s ever said to me (No I’m not calling you dumb buddy) but for real, WHY DIDN’T I FOLLOW THROUGH WITH THAT!? It’s probably around 9 P.M. now when the movie ends; remember I’m on about 33 hours of zero sleep. I am kind of dead, but I had a lot of Mountain Dew that day, so I also felt I was fine.  For whatever reason I forgot after the movie was over to tell him the address that was given to me. Now I’m already about an hour away from home, maybe a little bit more. Driving that distance at night with that little of sleep was already a bad decision on my end, and it wouldn’t be my first for the night.

                 

             The movie ends and all my cousins go home or wherever they went, but I was back on my own needless to say. I make the really stupid choice of going to meet this girl at the location of her choosing (which was her home). Not only did the lack of sleep make it a stupid choice, the fact I knew nothing about her, or even the fact NO ONE IN THE WORLD KNEW WHERE I WAS. But also it was like an extra thirty or forty minutes from where I was, and from home. First I stopped at a Wal-Mart nearby and bought two energy shots (Yes you were right, my decisions could get even stupider). I took one, and honestly I hate those things, they make me feel twitchy and make my heart race. But I was worried about falling asleep at the wheel (Yeah I know, THAT’S all you’re worried about moron?). I follow the address given to me, rocking out to my jams, thinking I’m so cool, going to meet some chick on a Saturday night. I don’t even need sleep, screw sleep, I’m invincible! I thought my car was badass, I thought I was badass. OK my car was still pretty cool. But anyway I keep going and I keep getting further into the woods (I know RED flag idiot). I kept traveling further and further and honestly my invincibility factor was starting to fade and my inner coward was starting to show. Its pitch black outside now, around 10 P.M. and I’ve lost cell service (TURN AROUND!). I didn’t turn around, my piece of shit brain pushed me further into this insane situation. I even remember my radio signals were fading in and out in my car, and then some creepy back western 1950s song came on singing about killing people or something, ( AHHHH!!) OK that didn’t happen thank god, but the stations were going in and out.

               Here comes one of the absolute worst experiences I have ever brought upon myself though. We get on the phone with each other and I’m on a road in the middle of two fields, I stop in the center of the road. There’s an old broken down fence to one side and a giant creepy barn just up ahead on the left. I’m actually quite scared on the one hand, but on the other I grew up in territory like this, so for some UNKNOWN reason I gave it the benefit of the doubt. I listened to her guide me where to go, because I just missed her place. I look in my rear view mirror and she’s on the phone asking me if I see a flashlight behind me, and I did. I turn around and follow this light, like an idiot to the flame (something like that right?). I drive my car to it and she’s on a four wheeler with a hoodie on, I really can’t make anything out about her. But like a (F******) dumb-ass, I pull into this place, now right off the bat I can tell you it wasn’t even a driveway, it was a damn path! A PATH! Why would I do this, seriously, I hate myself just writing this and taking myself back to this day. It was a grass path off a dirt road, in the middle of nowhere. I pull through, and what’s worse you can’t even see the road behind the trees blocking it. So I pull in and I’m starting to think dude just turn around and leave (You’re just thinking that now?). I get out of my car and the house is kind of broken down, and majorly creepy. There are no lights on and she walks up to me and she looks absolutely nothing like her profile pic from that site. I’m not a body shamer but really why lie? She was well over the weight she appeared to be in the picture, and when she took down her hood, no joke one of her eyes was like cock eyed. I somehow ended up in the backwoods of the “Hills Have Eyes” movie. You might be thinking well you’re a dick judging her for her looks so much, which for starters if she hadn’t lied in her pictures, I wouldn’t have been mean (in my head). It’s not like if I passed her in the store I’d point and laugh at her. But we meet for the first time, and honestly for this weird situation I put myself in, she was just kind of shy but was being nice. Remember I’m on about 34 hours now with now no sleep, if I hadn’t taken the energy shot, who knows what would’ve happened. But I have a problem saying no to people, meaning I really wanted to get in my car and drive away, but I felt obligated to follow her in that house (takes huge gulp).

         I follow her and let me tell you never in my entire life, have I been so afraid. Seriously, I walk straight into a live action horror movie. My heart falls into my feet, I feel like I turned more pale white than I usually am. She leads the way and in the first room is the living room and there are literally like a 100 dead animals mounted on the walls! There are two dogs who are nonstop barking at me from the other side of the room. The lights are still all turned off; the only light in the room is from the TV that’s on, the glow giving way to the rest of the room. The Kitchen is connected and it’s absolutely disgusting, the counters are covered in garbage and dirty dishes. I’m freaking out now, this place was horrifying. Not that an animal mount is scary, but try like a 100 of every species! I swear there was a human on that wall. But I follow her to her room, and just when you thought it couldn’t get scarier, there were porcelain dolls covering a whole half of her bedroom!( I couldn’t make this up if I wanted!). What was even scarier she had no TV in there! Oh wait I left that part out earlier, we had discussed that we were going to watch a movie, and now I’m thinking OK I am only here to die. This is the end of me. The worst part is that nobody on the planet knew where I was. From somebody who wants to own a haunt for a living, has seen tons of horror movies and rarely gets scared by them, I can tell you I know what true fear is now.

We get in there, she sits on her bed, and I honestly don’t know what to do. If the fear on my face isn’t present, I must be a great actor. She tells me to sit down on the bed too; I cautiously lay like a half butt cheek on the end of the bed, pretty much as far from her as I can be. We talk about stuff for a few minutes, honestly couldn’t tell you what, because all I was waiting for was a giant man in a pig mask to bust through the wall and take me away. At this point I have settled on that I am going to die here, I have killed myself by putting myself in this situation, and was thinking of any possible way out. I ask where the bathroom is and she tells me. I get in there and of course it’s as disgusting as the rest of the house. There are like creepy dolls in the tub, now I am not an overly religious man. But I was praying my ass off to god at that moment. I stared at myself in the mirror, no sleep for so long, bags under my eyes. All I was thinking is I’m never going to see my cat again, my family, I’m going to be eaten, or buried alive out in the middle of nowhere, all due to my own negligence. Finally I came to the decision I need to get out of here (FINALLY!?). I bravely walk back to her room and we talk for a few more minutes about bullshit. I finally say out of nowhere, I have had like over 34 hours no sleep (hey not even a lie) and I had a decent length trip home, and that I really should be going. She seemed surprised, and I was just waiting for her to say “NO!” and then for evil cannibals to grab me and shove me in the fridge. But she walked me back to my car. I was silently saying to myself “Please don’t let my tires be slashed, please don’t my tires be slashed, please don’t let my tires be slashed”. We get back outside and I know I’m just quivering in fear, the woods so dark and isolated. I say goodbye and I was even nice enough to say we might chill sometime, in public (NEVER, NEVER, NEVER). We say bye and I jump in my car and turn around, still expecting this to be a ploy, and some evil farmers to stop me before I can leave. That just maybe she was a nice one, but the rest found out I was going and were going to make sure that wasn’t happening. I pull out of the driveway though, and I’m on my way. OH MY GOD the relief I felt was never more amazing. I screamed out in glory! I took the other energy shot, and cranked my music. I set my GPS for home, and I yelled out to Dexter I was on my way!

                I didn’t know how to feel about this whole story. Honestly it was humiliating, and I felt it made me look pathetic(it probably does). I kept it to myself; I didn’t tell a single soul that is until two weeks later when I met my awesome girlfriend. Obviously it wasn’t a first date story, but after a few weeks went by, I told her. I felt comfortable, and she didn’t judge (yes she did). It was definitely an experience I’ll never forget, even though I wish I could. It made me realize just how much we shouldn’t take for granted, keep in mind; this was a really low point in my life, one of the lowest, I mean that whole year leading up to this. But something like that will change your mind. I Know you’re probably like that ending is a little anti-climactic. But because it was me, I’m glad! I never spoke to that girl again after that and she never reached out to me again either. You might be like Oh C’mon it’s not that bad, but if you were there, so alone in that hell hole, I don’t care how manly you think you are. You would’ve been afraid. The message of this blog is only meet strangers in public places! I wonder if after I left she was thinking “Wow what a weirdo”, oh the irony!