Respecting The Next Generation

       Before I get started with this one, I just want to put out there, this isn’t meant to bash anyone I know or call anyone out. It’s just my personal opinion. The other day I had my two younger cousins up to my place, one is 11 and one is 14. Not little kids, but let’s face it until you’re 18 at least, you are a child. These guys are awesome, and I like hanging out with them. Their mom busts her ass for them and I know she’s a great mom, so this has nothing to do with her. But I realized later when I dropped them off to our grandmas the next day, she said a few times she was shocked when I said they were really good. They didn’t fight or anything and we had a lot of fun. Well this got me thinking for the past few days, what the reason for this is. Honestly I believe it boils down to a certain level of respect between them and myself. Now I realize for different people kids can act differently, especially their parents or grandparents. However I just feel when they come up here, I don’t really treat them like kids, I just hang out with them, listen to them, have fun. They don’t fight much and they seem to be having a good time as far as I know. I rarely boss them around, but if I did ask something of them, they would do it.

         Now this is coming from someone who doesn’t have kids, nor doesn’t want them. So you can take my ideals with a grain of a salt if you want. But I just feel sometimes I see these people who have kids, and who don’t respect them. What I mean by that is kids have thoughts, they have likes and dislikes, and they have personalities. They are people, just not full grown yet. To give them your time of day, your attention, means a lot to them. I realize my cousins I spoke of aren’t small children but I still believe it applies. My 11 year old cousin is hilarious, this kids witty comebacks and comments he makes, astonish me sometimes. I was never that smart at his age. To not give him some time to chill with is a mistake. We always have fun messing with each other. I actually inspired him to write his own blog, and it’s pretty good! ( colton222.wordpress.com). With my 14 year old cousin I completely understand being 14. I remember hating that time of my life at that age, and hating school. If she wants to hang out to get away from it all, I totally understand. Plus I got her into professional wrestling and that automatically makes it fun to hang out even more. She’s also very easy to scare, if you throw on a good horror movie, actually they both are a couple of scaredy cats, and if you know me, it’s kinda what I love to do (scare people, haunter, hello?).

        Maybe for me personally sometimes it’s easier to connect to kids over adults because I like what they like still, I am essentially a big kid. I love cartoons, talking about random stuff that doesn’t matter, and not acting like an adult most of the time. In fact just a few weeks ago, my sister had a birthday party for her oldest kid that turned four. My whole family was in a conversation about some “adult” stuff, I don’t even remember now. But I found it much more interesting to play Legos with him. My girlfriend also has three little cousins who are one, five, and nine that we hang out with frequently. These kids are also hilarious; it’s worth hanging out with them just to have them make you laugh. The stuff they come up with cracks me up. The other day their mom shared on Facebook that the five year old was watching the new “Jungle Book” movie, the real one, and he asked “Why is the boy in his underwear? Should I be watching this?” I wasn’t even there for this one, but it still cracks me up just thinking of him saying this. They love playing video games with me; in fact one Saturday they were up I played video games with them literally all day, not my girlfriend’s cup of tea. But hey I thought it was fun. I guess maybe that’s what’s cool with hanging out with most kids, is that they put you on this pedestal. They think you are the coolest person, and if you’re me, you really aren’t that cool. When you have boring jobs, you aren’t rich, and honestly just aren’t that successful all around (at least not yet), but yet this little person is like I want to spend all day with you because you’re awesome. It’s a good feeling, at least to me. Maybe it resonates with me because a lot of times in my adult life I still feel a lot of people don’t listen to me. Or don’t really care about what I have to say, or what I’m into. I can’t blame people for not being into the same stuff as me, but if I can show interest in what a child is into and make them feel important, well I will. I also am not a normal 23 year old; to me a fun Saturday night is staying in with people I like, ordering a pizza, and playing video games all night. I’d rather hang out with my little cousins than at a bar filled with dumbasses.

          I feel a big part of this is where ones self-esteem starts, and it’s either going to go up or down. From someone who doesn’t have high self-esteem, you should really take this into consideration. I remember when I was a kid an uncle of mine had good friends in a couple that lived out in Ohio, and we took a trip out there. Actually we did a few times. But this one time when I was like ten years old, we were all around the dinner table, food was being set out. So like a normal kid who was starving after a long day of the zoo or whatever we did, I started eating, I specifically remember it was a burger and I was like half way through it. Then suddenly to my left the father of the family in a loud yelling voice said “ARE YOU EATING!?” and it scared the crap out of me and I dropped the burger to my plate. The wife was calming him down, because in THEIR household they said prayer before eating. I was like TEN YEARS OLD, what the hell is wrong with this guy; seriously to this day I am angry about this. Who yells at a child in their home who isn’t from a home where they do that? It wasn’t like beforehand they said “Could you all please wait until we say our prayers”. We never have done that in my family, that’s great they do, but really to this day I still feel like because of this experience, it’s one of the reasons why I hate having family-like dinners at other people’s houses. Anyway the point to this story is there was no respect there. Yes I was a kid, but seriously shit like that is uncalled for. I want to invite this guy to my home now that I’m an adult and have my girlfriend whip up her amazing burgers, and set them right in front of him, and right when he’s about to eat yell “WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? In this house the guest watches us eat first” (True story too).

         Anyway I totally understand kids can be annoying, and they do need to be disciplined at times. They need to be taught right from wrong. But what’s wrong with giving them your attention every now and then, I’m not perfect I do it too. I know if my siblings are reading this they are probably thinking well you haven’t paid much attention to your nieces and nephew, and that’s probably true except to me there’s a difference between kids and babies. Their kids are now starting to get to the point where it isn’t awkward for me to hang out with them. Babies I just feel weird around though, they’re like these tiny squishy aliens. My youngest niece is one years old now, and I feel now we can start to get to know each other a little better because she’s walking around and sort of speaking. The other two now are talking a lot more and it’s definitely less awkward and more fun to hang out with them. Actually just a little bit ago, my brother texted me saying he was listening to Disney songs in the car with his daughter, and “Be Prepared” came on (Ya know Scar from the Lion King) and he said it’s my song to her (He’s my favorite Disney villain…yes I have a favorite OK) and she said “No uncle Nate’s not scary”. This means she clearly doesn’t know me well enough yet (just kidding, but for real haunter? Hello again?). But it was funny to hear because to kids that don’t know me, I probably am creepy, well and adults, but not to her! (I have resting hate-face alright….fine you can call it resting bitch face, but I’m sticking with hate-face).

      I guess after this rambled mess I just spewed, all I am saying is why have kids if you really aren’t ready? No I don’t just mean financially, but mentally. If you can’t handle hanging out with them, listening to them, then you aren’t ready. The whole mentality of the old days, where kids shouldn’t have a say or voice, in which they should just should stand quietly or go away while the adults speak, is ridiculous. Sometimes the power trip I see adults get on with their kids or any kids is disgusting. Seriously show some respect, one day they are going to grow up and do you really want to be the one that messed them up? That person they look back on and are still upset about, the one who didn’t spend enough time with them, or who yelled at them at the dinner table for NO REASON. Think back to your childhood, I’m sure there’s at least one adult you don’t want to be remembered as. People are annoying these days that just keep popping them out without thinking about any of this. Kids aren’t an accessory item; they aren’t something you just have to have like it’s a job, like society loves to shove down our throats (Yes I realize accidents happen) but put some real thought into it….please.